Democrats Prepare for War with North Korea

[photo via google]
(A Bob Wall Exclusive Report). Barak Obama was given a grim briefing by the CIA, containing a where’s waldo pop up in the middle of the briefing document, bearing the image of Kim Jong il to help the Commander in Chief understand the gravity of the situation. Unable to find Waldo, he did find the “little slant-eyed-Buddah-wanna-be-bugger” and when told who it was and what he was about to do, in customary fashion, Obama took action, and called for reserve teleprompters to be sent to the area as a precaution in case dire action is required. “This has really pissed me off,” Obama told those near to the situation: “I was right in the middle of Malia and Sasha reading a story to me, and I was about to hear what happened to the goat, when these CIA clowns broke in with this crap. However, I am the leader of something, and am called to duty, so the story will have to wait.”

In the meantime, Speaker-Lame Nancy Pelosi, was unavailble for comment, since fresh Botox injections have rendered her facial muscles paralyzed, and she is unable to speak.

Harry Reid was briefed by the CIA as well, and stands with the President on this crisis: “This situation just shows why we need the Dream Act. We’re going to need reinforcements if we’re going to take this runt-reprobate on, and just like Americans no longer clean their own houses, or bus tables, we should do the same with the military: in exchange for immediate enlistment, we will take all aliens, their immediate and extended families, give them welfare, free housing, free healthcare, and a mule and 40 acres, if they’ll just join up and fight for the good old USA. If we learned anything from the war in Iraq, it’s use mercenaries.” As part of war preparations, Reid is prepared to appropriate 5 million dollars for each AFL-CIO union member in good standing, and nationalize the aviation, movie, and fast food industreis. “We have to have those things, if we are to fight a good, clean war.”

Sources close to Obama, tell the Bob Wall, Obama has called former French President Jacques Chirac in as a consultant, just in case surrender is the only option. As part of plan for American response, Chirac has suggested all residents of the San Francisco Bay Area be given white flags, and signs in Korean which say: “환영합니다, 우리가 항복. 우리와 함께 네 맘대로 해하고 좋은 하루 보내세요”, which translates into English: “We Surrender, Welcome Have your way with us, and Have a Nice Day”. Chirac was expected to travel to San Francisco today, to look at possible victory parade routes for the North Koreans. “The stray dog and cat population in San Francisco is about to be a thing of the past, and we want the North Koreans to feel at home; everyone must make sacrifices in times of war”, Chirac stated. However, while most in San Francisco could care less who invades America, as long as no one confiscates their purple sunshine LSD, there are developing pockets of resistance. For instance, Joaquinn Phoenix said that was out of the question: “They’ll pry my 18 Housecats from my cold, dead figers,” Phoenix proclaimed.

Unable to speak, it is reported Nancy Pelosi has written a memo to staff, wondering if there is time to get a small eye tuck, before all Hell breaks loose? More as it becomes available.

**Many Thanks to Bob Schneider for permission to copy this***


9 responses to “Democrats Prepare for War with North Korea

  1. Too funny! Can’t wait for the movie!

  2. That was so funny because it is probably true!

  3. I hope you enjoy the piece, and thanks to our Patriotic Nurse!

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  6. Dennis Miller: “Democrats have a war room for everything except war.”

  7. LOL! Can you imagine? I would not put it past the former head pretentious snob of the axis of weasels Chirac to consult w/ Obama that way. And to do so to the US, a country that has saved his bacon a number of times throughout history.

  8. Erica, I must also hand it to Bob! BWAAAAHAAAHAAA! It was great!

    Keep slaying moonbats Erica!

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